Now, I know that you are like 92.5 years old and have to keep running around to keep the press away from your running mate, so I get you're busy. But do you think you could possibly manage to find the time to show up for the debate. I understand you are "putting country first" but I respectfully submit the following:
1. You are not on any committee that comes even close to touching the financial crisis. This means that your only job on this one is to show up and vote, then get back in your plane and get to the debate.
2. Even if you do stay in D.C. to talk bail out, do you seriously think the Democratic leadership is going to allow you to monopolize the conversation? Um, they're taking care of this one... go sit down... in a plane and get to the debate.
3. What could you possibly have to add to the conversation when just a week ago you said, "The fundamentals of the American economy are strong." I guess the devil is in how we define "fundamentals" - clearly you don't include credit, banks, the stock market or the housing market in your definition. So just go to the debate.
4. If you really want to be president, isn't this the perfect time for you to talk directly to the American people and tell them why you're the guy. If only there were some place you could go and have national media attention and a chance to contrast yourself with your opponent.... like a debate.
5. I think if you want to be president you ought not make it look like you can't handle a difficult situation without completely dropping all the other balls in the air. Isn't the president supposed to be able to, like, multi-task and stuff? Go to the debate.
6. Finally, I have to believe that the American people, while generally an apathetic lot, can see right through this for what it is: a pathetic stunt. So knock it off and go to the debate.