Thursday, November 04, 2010

The Do-Over

This is going to sound awful, but I am not used to failing. I have lived a charmed life during which I can recall very few instances when I did not get what I wanted. I'm not talking about Christmas and birthday gifts (still waiting on that trip to Space Camp, Numi). Rather, I mean auditions/interviews/try-outs/contests. I have been very lucky.

Knowing that, you can imagine how surprised I was to have bombed my PhD comprehensive exams a couple of months ago. I haven't talked to many people about it, but let's just say it was completely out of the blue and a major blow. I still can't bring myself to wear the clothes I wore that day again because I suspect they are jinxed.

I just received confirmation that I will be retaking these exams the week of Thanksgiving and defending my answers on December 14th. I think I know what I did wrong the first time.... and I think I can be ready.... and I think I can get through relatively unscathed. But the fear factor is amazingly high on this one.

It's got me wondering about what else I might take a "do-over" on if I had the chance. For me, it's my wedding. Not the marriage, but there are lots of things I would change about the actual event if I could go back in time.