Monday, November 20, 2006

Beware: A Rant

I have been absent recently, due, in part, to some emergency family situations, but mostly because our laptop just up and quit on us. UGH! So in honor of our crappy computer and the fact that I am an inch away from strangling the next a**hole who bugs me at work – here’s another list of things that are pissing me off.

1. Second-hand laptops that work perfectly for 3 months and then die - repeatedly.

2. People telling me to eat something. Or even better: People asking my husband if I'm ok because I've lost weight and, apparently, have bags under my eyes?!?! Thanks, that feels good.

3. The fact that I am in the mood to crank some System of a Down, but am at work and must, therefore, settle for something that doesn’t have a parental warning sticker.

4. Blah, blah, blah. Things about work.

5. Tumors in the bone. FU** YOU!

6. People who claim poverty to me. I work for a non-profit, am the sole bread-winner in the family, and in two weeks will be faced with a literal SH**-load of medical bills (see #5). Don’t tell me how poor you are, I really don’t want to hear about it.

7. The liberal media myth. This one’s just under my skin right now because I’m watching the post-election coverage and it’s so blatantly pro-conservative/Republican that I could vomit.

8. Criminals as church leaders. If you have, oh I don’t know, embezzled thousands of dollars from a previous employer YOU ARE A THIEF, not a spiritual advisor.

9. Cramps and anything involving my nether regions. I’d like to saw myself in half.

10. The fact that I have to wait until March or April to find out about school. I miss being in school so badly right now, and I just want to know if I’m going or if I’m trapped here for another hellishly boring year. Dear UW, Please let me be a Husky. Love always, Eris.

Wow, I really do feel better now.

PS - Mom, I'm really ok.

1 comment:

The Duchess said...'s really too bad you aren't Catholic because when I launch into a rant like that, I like to follow it up with about 9 gin and tonics. Then everything feels fabulous again.

And, btw, you look fabulous! So eat what you can and f*** em!