Saturday, June 28, 2008

Who's Laughing Now?

Ok, this is a judgemental post full of my own self-congratulations, so consider yourself warned. Many of you may know I used to teach Gospel Doctrine class at my LDS ward. This was fun for me as I: 1. don't know the first thing about technical gospel doctrine; and B. enjoyed making up my own doctrine. Take your pick on which one got me released. Personally, I think it was the fact that I didn't let the bishop attend my class.

The last week of the year I did a Bible trivia game based on the stories and lessons we had had through the previous year. I used scripture references to back up my questions, and some of them had come to my attention through non-LDS websites. I DID NOT QUOTE ANY NON-LDS SCRIPTURE OR REFERENCE IN MY CLASS.

After this game, a member of the Sunday School Presidency (a freshly minted return missionary about 22 years-old) came up to me and lectured me on using non-church authorized lessons or sources. Let me point out this was an extra week for which there was no lesson in the manual! I took it in stride then spent the next few weeks trying to make his head explode when I blinked at church.

Cut to tonight: Scout dinner at the church. This young man attended with a woman I assume is his girlfriend. She brought a card game to play at the table. By herself. The cards all had heads on them. The game was called "Guillotine" and had a little guillotine to put on the table.

Mr. Eris got a real kick out of it. I was non-plussed until the game turned up missing and they had to announce over the microphone that they had misplaced a card game called "Guillotine" sometime during the dinner. I'm still giggling.

Monday, June 23, 2008

Can I Get an Amen?!

I have a favorite bra. It is the Full Coverage bra from Victoria's Secret. Every year in December I buy two of this bra with my birthday coupon from VS. I love this bra.

Last year when I went in to buy my bra I got the bad news: discontinued. NOOOOOOOO! I was devastated. They showed me the new style and I bought it. I hate it. It has too much padding and is designed to push the ladies up and to the center, thus creating copious cleavage in the form of a third breast right in the middle of my chest. Mr. Eris likes the bra. I hate it. I want to set it on fire and dance around it - bra-less.

On Saturday I was at the mall (a place I never go). They have remodeled our VS so I decided to drop in and see how it looks. Holy Crap!!! My bra is back!!! I was so excited I almost cried - seriously. I went in the dressing room and tried it on and there in the mirror were my two breasts. Perfectly supported and happy as ever. Ah, the joy of a perfect bra.

I drove to a different mall so I could have two. Thank you, VS, for bringing back my bra.

Thursday, June 12, 2008

A Good Night

Today I went Father's Day shopping for Mr. Eris. We got some good stuff - mostly functional, but one fun DVD. While shopping I decided to indulge in some DVDs for the family. I believe firmly that our children should be exposed to all the classics, in order for them to become well-rounded and informed citizens. We brought them home and watched them immediately, with dinner in between. Yes, my children have now seen The Goonies and Gremlins.

Then, as a reward for Mr. Eris's hard work at work this week (including some late nights working from home) I made milkshakes. Oreo milkshakes. My neighbor really loves those, so I made one for her too. Then I got creative and made a soyshake. I recently discovered that soy ice cream tastes like cookie dough, so I was feeling brave. I enjoyed a chocolate and peanut butter soyshake - and it was GOOD!

Monday, June 09, 2008

Drill This... and Other Stuff

Ok, it's time for just a hodge-podge of rants and other goings on in the mind and life of Eris:

1. The Prez gave a press conference today in which he acknowledged how tough it is for Americans to have to pay so much for gas. His solution? Drilling in ANWAR and the continental divide. Um, let me get this straight: you've had 7 years to do something about the environment and the predicted energy crisis and you spent it a. denying global warming was happening; b. pushing BS like the "Clear Skies Inititative (Orwell would have been so proud); c. bullying the EPA into unwise policies; and d. telling the world to take Kyoto and shove it - and now you're going to solve it with ANWAR, an area that will yield minimal oil at best and would destroy an ecosystem?! Holy buckets, is it January yet?

2. Spoke in church yesterday - the importance of using your mind and your faith together to inform your testimony and actions in the world. My grandma claims she only understood half of it... and I'm waiting for a call from the Bishop to schedule my hearing.

3. Little Mr. Eris is at Lagoon with a friend today. First time without the 'rents. (His friends' 'rents are there, but it's not the same.) So big!

4. The Numismatist finished Twilight yesterday so I picked it up and took her New Moon. She started last night. I'm not proud to admit this, but I already read Twilight again since she gave it back at 4 yesterday. I think it's time for an intervention or detox or something. But ice cream social, look out!

5. Meemoo's folks are celebrating the big three-oh. They are my favorite toilet family and this marriage brought me one of my most inappropriate adolescent crushes (cousin Clay) so I'm all about the celebratin'!

6. My foot is asleep.

Wednesday, June 04, 2008

Eris's Secret Life of Crime

Today I left the house in a hurry. I forgot my wallet... which means I rode FrontRunner and TRAX all the way from Ogden to the U and then back again without my U Transit Pass.

Is it time for an intervention?

Tuesday, June 03, 2008

B.F.F.

Today I joined the Duchess and 8 of her closest friends for SATC the movie. It was awesome - great plot twists and very true to the characters from the series. But SATC is not the subject of this post. The Duchess is. Prepare yourselves, the gushing is about to begin.

Six years ago I walked into one of my last undergraduate classes at WSU and was much dismayed to find that the professor was my age and about a half-foot shorter than I. I doubted her ability to teach me anything, she was so young! But she did teach me. A LOT. Not only in class, but in her work with extracurricular groups in the department. She advised to try graduate school - an option I had never considered to be open for me (graduate school is for smart people).

We got to know each other outside of school at Democrat stuff. I will admit I sat by her mostly so I could sneak closer looks at her husband, but then I found that I genuinely liked her. I could look past her lack of appreciation for Neil Diamond and Steven Tyler. I could even forgive her for being a Yankees fan. We became friends.

We bonded and soon she was the Numismatist's favorite daughter. I am ok with that. The Duchess looks more like my Utah family than I do, anyway, and Athena and I are resigned to the fact that we are now part of a trio. I like to think that in the past 5 years, she has become family. We have been through a lot together and I wouldn't trade her for anything. When something exciting happens, I want to tell her. When I need advice, I ask her. And I like that our daughters are growing up together.

Anyway, as I drove home today I realized how happy I am to know that we are friends. I look forward to sharing many more movies and books and religious discussions and bbqs and poker nights with the Duchess. She is my fancy-pants friend and I would be lost without her.